I know, I know. It was a cold lonely place and I try not to think about it too much, but we did. And we survived fine without it. Although it seems unthinkable now.
Growing up in the eighties and nineties, I didn't even have the internet in school. It was only when I moved to uni in '97 that I discovered the awesomeness that was the worldwide web. And back then businesses having their own websites were few and far between, whereas today it's the ones without internet that are far from the norm!
I became addicted to the internet very quickly and while others around me in the computer labs were frantically trying to produce essays to a deadline, I'd be on the chat rooms wasting away many hours with complete strangers. This was before social media was even a popular thing, back when Friends Reunited were still trying to charge you a fiver if you wanted to find out what anyone from your school was actually doing with their lives.
Wow, I feel like I'm typing in a foreign language since what we have now is so far removed from that.
Nowadays we have our smartphones and a world of information literally at our fingertips. No longer do you have to wonder how many kids Sally from school has. Or if you're watching a tv programme and you can't place the hot lead guy in it, you can actually just google him rather than wreck your head for the next few days trying to work out what TV programme he used to be the geeky kid in ten years ago. You can even cheat in a pub quiz. (Although you shouldn't, and if you do, I judge you pretty hard. Cheating is not cool, folks!)
But here's what annoys me. I don't know about other countries, but there are so many places in Scotland where you can't get any internet whatsoever. So you're driving about Scotland, taking awesome pictures, desperate to post them on Instagram . . . and you can't because there's no bloody 4G for miles around! You have some pithy observation you want to tweet but it just keeps flashing up saying "posting... posting... posting" and eventually just fails. Or lets you think it's failed and then it ends up posting twice, it's just you didn't know that cos of the shitty signal!
Last October I was in Fuerteventura, and one day we went over to one of my favourite places - a little uninhabited island called Lobos. I remember standing on the dock waiting for the boat back . . . and tweeting my shock that I had a better internet signal on an uninhabited island in the middle of the Atlantic than I did in most parts of Scotland!
I know people say you should switch off from the internet and social media for once in a while... but personally I find little more frustrating than not having the option to get on the internet if you want it. We stayed in a hotel at the weekend where my 4G was very weak and the hotel wi-fi was sporadic at best . . . and as I pointed out to the boyfriend, this is actually a worse situation than having either great wi-fi or no wi-fi whatsoever. If you have no wi-fi, you just don't even bother trying to access the internet. If you have decent wi-fi you'll actually go on less (in theory) because you know you have it at any time.
Half-assed wi-fi is the worst, because you spend more time trying to see if your tweet sent, your picture eventually posted on Insta, or (in this case, because the TV remote wasn't working) trying and failing to find out if there's anything on the telly you actually want to watch. And moaning about how rubbish the connection is.
(I'm looking back at the last few paragraphs and thinking "why do you keep saying 'wi-fi'? Stop it!")
So anyway . . . what's my point? Um . . . wait, I know!
Once upon a time I could survive without the internet. But now . . . I cannot. I need the internet to be there and accessible to me at all times whenever possible.
Please don't deny me my internet rights!!!
Can you survive without the internet?