Tuesday, 28 February 2012
And I don't really remember most of it.
I just remember waking up on the Saturday morning with a fuzzy head and a text on my phone from one of my friends which read: "whoever has got paulas fone give it back thanks x" (both mine and my friend's favourite bit of that text is the kiss on the end) and then it all came flooding back. Sort of.
The rest of the story has since been filled in by my slightly more sober friends.
Towards the end of the night, after many glasses of rose wine had been imbibed, I decided I had lost my phone. Mainly because I'd had it sitting on the table most of the night and it was no longer there. I started to panic, especially after I'd rifled through my bag and couldn't find it. "My phone!" I wailed. "I've lost my phone!"
Helpfully, everyone started to scramble around looking for it. Apparently the tables were moved around, the couches and armchairs (it was THAT kind of pub, no normal tables and chairs for us!) were pushed aside to see if my phone was there. Nothing.
In the meantime, I was apparently just sitting there, like the Queen or something like that. Letting everyone else search. I'm not sure what exactly was going through my mind as it's all a drunken blur to me. I'm assuming I was probably sleeping with my eyes open.
(I would also like to add that I was possibly going through somewhat of a nervous breakdown that night, having earlier found out something that had really upset me. So I was probably not only drunk, but also a bit strung out, which probably didn't help my state of mind.)
One of my friends has informed me this was going on for about five or so minutes when I suddenly put my hand down my top, pulled my phone out of my bra, looked at said phone in confusion and said:
"Oooh look! There's a phone down my top. Is it mine???"
(I'm clearly not the brightest light in the sky while under the influence. Would there be ANY reason why a phone other than my own would be in my bra??? Anybody got a decent explanation for that? I can barely explain why my OWN phone was down my top in the first place, let alone why someone ELSE'S phone would be.)
Yeah, so I'd panicked my my entire group about losing my phone and it had inexplicably been down my top the whole time.
Not quite as bad as the night out a few weeks ago when I woke up with bruises down my right side the morning after and no recollection as to how it happened - and then found out I'd tried to sit on a chair and missed (eek!), but it's certainly a wee bit funnier (in my view) than that story.
Probably a good thing I've given up on wine for a while, eh???
Any good/embarrassing/funny drunken (or otherwise) stories to share???
Monday, 27 February 2012
"Haven't you ever wondered what happened when Elizabeth and Jessica grew up?"
I feel like I grew up with Sweet Valley High. Well, technically the Wakefield twins were sixteen when I was barely born and were still sixteen when I MYSELF was sixteen (in that weird time loop they seemed to live in where they could be sixteen for 20 years and also ten, twelve AND eighteen years old concurrently - freaky!) but I feel like they were around for most of my teen years as I gobbled up novel after novel - usually in no particular order, as the local library and their current stock of books held the power.
Did I ever think a grown-up version of the books would come out? Well, no. It was one of those things I would vaguely think about while drunkenly searching online for books from my teenage years (what? Just me???) but I never actually thought it would come to fruition.
So when I started to hear buzz back in 2009 around the blogosphere that Sweet Valley Confidential would soon become a reality, I was pretty excited. Perhaps that was actually the problem - that I built it up in my head into something it wasn't. That it couldn't possibly live up to expectations.
Well, it couldn't. Because to be frank? It's just not very good.
Let's face it, probably I'm looking back at the original books through rose coloured glasses for as a teenager I thought the writing was the best ever. I even dreamed of writing my own high school series just like it. I guess the difference is now that the tinted glasses are gone and the writing is not that great here.
The story begins with us being introduced to Elizabeth as a twenty-something. Her life clearly isn't turning out the way she'd thought it would, she is on her own in New York City, and it's clear that something dramatic has happened to stop her speaking to her twin sister and soulmate Jessica.
And we find out very early on what that something dramatic was - Jessica has committed the ultimate betrayal and stolen the love of Elizabeth's life! Elizabeth, having fled Sweet Valley and everything that she holds dear as a result, is forced to take stock of her life and try and move on . . . but the betrayal continues to cast a shadow over her life and she eventually decides the only thing she can do to even attempt to make herself feel better is to exact revenge on the two people who have wronged her most.
And so the book basically focuses on this, barely touching on anything else as far as I can see. Flashbacks show just how far back the betrayal went, although in the scenes set in the present, Jessica (surprisingly) comes off as the more sympathetic character. Which is weird. But then EVERYTHING is topsy turvy in this book.
The majority of the other characters in this book are merely background, which makes it even more confusing that the original cast grown up are as far removed from their old characters as they could possibly be. Bruce Patman, snob extraordinaire back in the day, is now nice - AND Elizabeth's best friend! Wimpy Enid is now a snob. Former class clown Winston is now a rich, nasty jerk. The only person who seems to be pretty much the same is Lila Fowler, although she barely appears in the novel at all. The reasons for these changes in character are not examined in too much detail in most of these cases. There doesn't seem that much point, therefore, in them being there at all.
The flashbacks I mentioned previously are generally quite tedious, and are told from various different viewpoints in the first person, which makes the book's progression a bit clumsy. Despite the fact it was a fairly easy to read (albeit not well written) book, the constant jumping about from past to present and back, and from one person's view to another, made me tire of it quickly and a book that would normally only take me about two hours to read took me several days. And I didn't particularly care how it ended by the time it drew to a close anyway.
I'm really sad I didn't enjoy this book because, like I said, I had high hopes for it, and I don't think it would have been THAT difficult to make it a bit more compelling and interesting. I LIKED that there was a bit of a real-life edge compared to the original novels - the idea that the girls didn't ALWAYS have a perfect cookie cutter ending and weren't necessarily coasting along in life still was nice. But I think it would have been nice to have placed slightly less focus on the twins and maybe included the other characters in it more. I know the series was based around them and they were the centre of it, but as grown ups they weren't really interesting enough to carry the story on their own.
Overall verdict? If you were a SVH fan as a kid and fancy a trip down memory lane, by all means give it a go, but you'll probably be disappointed. If you were never a fan, then this won't convert you.
Buy the book online: Sweet Valley Confidential (Sweet Valley High)
Did you read Sweet Valley High as a kid? Did you read Sweet Valley Confidential? Feel free to share your thoughts?
So it's been nearly a week now since I gave up wine for Lent. I started a day early, on Shrove Tuesday, so I had my last glass of wine nearly one full week ago now. I think this is the longest I've gone without wine since early 2009, where I managed (I believe) just over a week without any alcohol at all.
So I still have six weeks of no wine to go, and the thought is pretty daunting. I'm sure my liver will thank me, but my brain will probably not, because while over-thinking is what my sober brain does when left to its own devices. Wine makes my thoughts mildly fuzzy and rose-tinted.
Things I have found so far:
- it's hard for me to find other alcoholic drinks I like while in the pub. Flavoured ciders such as Kopparberg Strawberry & Lime are delicious . . . but I need to go to the loo more because there's a lot of liquid in one bottle. Vodka and mixer is okay providing the vodka isn't too overpowering . . . but I drink those too fast. Wine is my perfect drink as it gets me tipsy, I can drink it all night without it making me too drunk, and I don't need to get up to visit the toilet very often. I don't see myself finding a good equivalent of this during my experiment.
- I feel more tired. I'm not sure why this is. On Friday night, for example, I got home at about 10.15pm, was in my bed by 11 and asleep by 12. Yet I struggled to wake in time for 10 the following morning.
- I made last-minute plans to go out for dinner on Thursday night and stuck to a diet coke - I had both of my courses done in well under an hour. Usually I'm too busy drinking my wine and talking to get my eating done that fast. I'm not sure that's a good thing either way.
- I thought I would feel like I was saving money by not buying as much wine - so far I feel MORE skint. That could be purely coincidental though. I WAS quite broke anyway . . .
- Being on the internet isn't QUITE as interesting while not drinking wine. I think I have came to the point where I sort of equate the two, so perhaps it's a good thing I'm trying to separate them.
- Although I don't know whether I will last the full 40 days (or 41 in my case, I guess), I am proud that I've managed so far and think it will be a while before I give in at least. I was very close to snapping on Friday night (thanks for not encouraging me, K! It's much appreciated) but I managed to resist and am glad I did. Apparently adding Jesus into the equation, and making myself accountable for doing this by not only mentioning it on here but also on my Facebook, has helped abstain for longer than I ever have before. I think the fact I've not cut out ALL alcohol is also going to help me go for longer. The fact I've only had any alcohol at all on two nights since I gave up the wine is actually pretty incredible also!
Anyone got any suggestions for a good wine equivalent? I have a good NON-alcohol equivalent for drinking at home which is elderflower sparkling presse, but I don't have an alcoholic wine equivalent for when I'm in the pub. Any ideas? And if anyone has any hints or tips how to take my mind of the lack of cava in my life, please feel free to make suggestions also!
Sunday, 26 February 2012
You know when you become mildly obsessed with a song and feel like it speaks to you and can't get it out of your head or can't stop listening to it. Well . . . that.
You can buy it on amazon using the below link:
Saturday, 25 February 2012
|Available from here|
Anyway, in work the other day, the subject came up about whether or not we prefer cats or dogs. Most people seem to fall into definite camps of one or the other.
But I don't. I like cats and dogs equally. Obviously, there are certain breeds I like more than others, but if someone offered me the choice between a cat and a dog as a pet, I would be pretty torn. Ultimately I would probably go for a cat in terms of it probably needing less attention, but then I love the idea of a dog's unconditional love. So who knows what I would choose because I do find cats AND dogs pretty damn lovable and adorable.
I don't know if this is partly to do with the fact that I've never had a pet - i think generally if you had a cat as a child, or were exposed to one as a child, you end up a cat person . . .and similarly with a dog. Unless you have a bad experience with whatever you owned, then you might go the other way. But because I never had a pet and always secretly longed for any sort of pet, I like them all!
But it seemed, after this discussion, that I am in the minority about liking both and not having a preference.
Are YOU a cat or a dog person? Or, like me, do you like both?
Wednesday, 22 February 2012
- . . . FOR DIRECTIONS: I don't know any street names, I can get lost five minutes away from my flat, and I'm no good at describing how to reach a certain destination . . . even if I know where it is. In fact, even if it's around the corner, I still struggle. Anytime a stranger on the street says "Excuse me?" I feel dread creeping through my veins. Unless it's a person paid to harrass me for money for charities that is . . .
- . . . FOR MONEY FOR CHARITY: You can do this if you are volunteering, sure. Not if you're getting paid. I've talked about these "chuggers", as Mich calls them, before. The other night, in fact, she even told me to start crying just so one would avoid us. I'm pretty sure it doesn't work that way.
- . . . A HYPOTHETICAL QUESTION: Everyone knows hypothetical questions are usually based in fact. So I'll immediately want to know the actual gossip behind it, and I can be like a dog with a bone sometimes.
- . . . A RHETORICAL QUESTION: I find it too hard NOT to answer, even if it's obvious!
- . . . ON A DATE: Yeah, I'm not good at that. I'll probably just mess you around. Just ask the last guy who asked me out. I gave a vague answer, messed him around cos I just wasn't sure, and then accidentally ignored his Happy New Year text message because I was too damaged by someone else. Timing was all wrong, to be honest, and it's probably for the best (even now I wouldn't feel ready), but I hope my shitty behaviour didn't damage him at all. It was only ever meant to be just a lunch date, so it wasn't really a big deal and I kind of turned it into one I suppose. But, yeah, asking me out probably isn't a good idea. Which is probably why it happens so rarely!
- . . . TO DO YOUR MAKE-UP: I think I'm okay at doing my own make-up; I generally know what works for me. And I'm used to putting it on myself - I've had like twenty plus years of practice (yup, I wore eyeliner to primary school!). But let me loose on someone else? They'd end up looking like Rachel in "Friends" after she had to let Ross do her make-up (see? "Friends" reference for everything, me!) NOT a good look . . .
What should no one ever ask you???
Tuesday, 21 February 2012
And pretty much impossible to forget.
I just wish I didn't hurt so much.
Monday, 20 February 2012
This year though, I've made a big decision.
I'm giving up wine for 40 days.
Maybe if I throw the Catholic guilt into the ring, I might be able to pull myself out of this slightly worrying cava habit. Wish me luck, peeps!
Sunday, 19 February 2012
So the first thing I thought I might do (have I contradicted myself there?) is take up a new class. Or possibly two!
Obviously last year I took up pole fitness, which I was a bit apprehensive about, but I now am loving - even though I'm still pretty rubbish at it. This year I like the idea of taking up some other kind of exercise that is challenging and a bit different from your run of the mill exercise on top of that . . . but I'm also thinking about night classes.
So here's some ideas I've been toying with:
- Martial arts classes of some description - I did Judo for a few months when I was young and didn't mind it, and it's meant to be a great workout. Actually, one of my old flatmates invited me to join a class she is taking part in, but it is on a Friday night, which is a pain.
- Ballet - another class I did as a kid and never kept up. It could have possibilities!
- Aerial yoga - or even just yoga/pilates in general. Or circus skills. I did circus skills when I was young too, but it was just juggling, spinning plates, etc. This is like trapeze stuff! I mean - TRAPEZE!!! Unfortunately, this may be a little bit out of my price range.
- Vintage accessory making - Yes, I actually found a course for this at one of the local colleges - it sounds so much fun, and something I would really enjoy. But, although it says it's for any level, I can't even do basic stuff like, y'know, THREAD A NEEDLE! So I'm not sure if even beginner level would be too much for me,
- Jewellery making - this is probably the one that appeals to me most just now. And I'm pretty sure I could get a grant to cover the cost of it. I'm trying to talk Mich into it too so we can start a crazy jewellery business at the end of it!
- Spanish - I quite fancy learning another language but it's one thing I've never had a talent for. I would LIKE to try this but I think I would prefer something more FUN to start with.
- Cupcake making - I like to eat cupcakes, so I think I would be onto a winner there.
- Nails - it would be kinda cool to be able to do acrylics, or nail art or something like that.
So I'm looking into this stuff and researching it and I AM going to do something, not just think about doing it, for a change!!!
If money - or time! - was no object, what sort of class would YOU like to do?
Saturday, 18 February 2012
If anything it's made me decide that now is the time to turn it off. The fact of the matter is, I have now wasted a year and a half of my life giving too much of a crap about someone who clearly didn't give too much of a crap about me (if you follow). So I'm wallowing no longer, overthinking no longer . . . I'm just done with the whole thing.
I'm moving on.
I'm not saying I'm planning to get involved with anyone else anytime soon, don't get me wrong. To be honest, I'm so utterly broken at the moment that it's going to take me a while to even consider it.And I don't want someone else to be the one to fix me. That's not a solution, that's just a band-aid for the pain, a temporary fix. I need to sort myself out. By myself.
So first thing on the agenda? To actually do what I planned to this year and get fit and healthy . . . and skinny! To get some savings sorted, to try and make some extra money . . . and to try and have some new experiences.
My 2012 has generally been a bit sucky so far (apart from my promotion, obviously!) - but I'm going to turn it around. I'm walking away from the crap.
Realising this has made me feel slightly better already. Baby steps . . .
Thursday, 16 February 2012
I've said it before and I'll say it again . . . probably many times in the future.
I am stronger than I look.
Okay, I cry a lot, yes. I get hurt. Also, a lot. But I cope.
I'll lock myself in a room and cry for days on end if I need to, talk the ears off those who will listen about my pain, listen to their words of comfort, embrace the misery until I can let it go.
And eventually I will.
I pride myself on the fact that, despite everything, I am a survivor.
And once again, this time, I know I will come out of it at the end.
It's just getting through the tunnel that is so bloody hard . . .
PS Why Britney? Just cos I can. It's Britney, bitch!
Monday, 13 February 2012
Sunday, 12 February 2012
Saturday, 11 February 2012
1) It means I need to get up early on a day off so I can be sure not to sleep through the buzzer.
2) It means I have to sit in virtual silence until said delivery SHOWS up as my room is at the back of a pretty big flat and if I am watching tv or listening to music, there's a fairly large chance I won't HEAR the buzzer
3) I feel like I can't relax until the delivery has happened. Which sucks when it's a weekend or I'm on annual leave - ie MY RELAX-TIME!!!
4) I'm really quite an impatient little bugger.
It's not so bad if it's, say, an Asda delivery as you book a two hour slot for those and so you have a VAGUE idea of what time it's going to show up (although I've had occasions when it's turned up before or after said slot) - at least you have a vague idea of the time parameters, can go outside if necessary and if it HASN'T turned up within the said time, at least you know it's not turned up and can complain if you want. Or a Dominos delivery, because it's not far from me, and if I book it I know it's going to turn up within half an hour.
But these all day delivery slots??? They do my head in!
I was arranging for something to be COLLECTED on Thursday. I had the day off work and a RIDICULOUS time slot of anytime between 8am and 8pm.
The courier did not show up.
To say I was beyond livid is a definite understatement.
I emailed the company to complain on Thursday night once it had reached 9pm and all my hopes were gone. I got a reply back yesterday to say they were sorry about this, if I wanted they could arrange a pick up with either a morning or afternoon delivery slot but they couldn't pick up on weekends. They also stated that it would be a different courier service so they couldn't guarantee it would be reliable.
I hate to state the obvious or irony here but their so called reliable service screwed me over, so that's kind of a moot point surely.
Anyhoo, I was out last night, crawled into bed at 2am and slept til after midday. When I got up, the courier company had put a card through my door TODAY saying they'd attempted to collect from me and i hadn't been in.
Now, this is highly possible - I was sleeping like the dead after all. But my collection day was THURSDAY. I had not instructed the company to rearrange a collection for Saturday. If I HAD, I would have been awake and listening out.
I am now even angrier.
Especially since this collection had the potential to make me nearly ninety quid. I'm not even sure if I want to use the company anymore but if I don't then it's a lot of wasted time. (I was trying to sell some unwanted dvds and cds in bulk and spent ages typing barcodes into the website, checking everything was there and making sure I managed to get it all packed into two boxes). I just wish delivery companies could bloody well be more reliable!!!
Have YOU had any bad experiences with courier companies?
Friday, 10 February 2012
How I'm feeling right now.
It seems like it's just about time for me to give up and walk away.
Thursday, 9 February 2012
Who's right? I'll be fucked if I know. Both of them have done fairly crappy things in their time, Cole in her little "racist" altercation with a bathroom attendant years ago and Harvey, more recently, cheating on his wife Alesha Dixon with Javine Hilton. Neither of them are angels. Either of them could be telling the truth - or lying.
To me though, this isn't the issue. If they wanted to have some sort of secret affair, then fair enough. I believe both of them were single at the time and, although Cheryl is friends with Harvey's ex wife, I guess that had been over for a long time and so he could be considered fair game. (I don't necessarily agree with this point, having found out recently that someone I thought was a friend had went on a date with my ex when our relationship was barely cold - but I'm playing devil's advocate here so I'm going to let this point go.)
It's Harvey who appalls me here. It's the fact that, over a year after this allegedly happens, he suddenly decides to announce it. I don't care if it is true or not - I just want to know why he feels he needs to do this. Why, ages after the fact, would he suddenly want to broadcast this? To me, it just smacks of cheap publicity. He's a washed-up has-been who was never really all that famous anyway (I bet when I put Cheryl Cole and MC Harvey's names at the start of this post, more of you would have wondered who Harvey was than who Cole was, which proves my point.)
There's the fact that one of Harvey's tweets to Cole apparently said "And let's get this straight @cherylcole I don't need no hype of you! I'd rather go broke and work in sainsburys than talk about your personal s**t." Um . . . are you SHITTING me, dude? You started this whole thing by talking about her personal shit. #shitstirrer
Now, while writing this post, I have found an article in which Harvey has now backtracked and claimed their relationship was all just text/email communication, they didn't go out, that the "secret relationship" angle was fabricated, and not by him. So why then, when Cole took to twitter to dispel the rumours, did he then not try to clear his name at the time? Why add fuel to the fire??? Oh wait, because it gave HIM more publicity. People know who he is now - and, for once it's not because he got caught cheating on his wife. SCORE, Harvey! You're now going to be forever known as the guy who lied about shagging Cheryl Cole and then blamed it on someone else. That's soooo much better.
So who do you think is telling the truth here? And, true or not, do you think it's right that so-called "celebrities" drag skeletons out of the closet to get more media attention? I'd love to hear your opinion! :-)
Wednesday, 8 February 2012
Tuesday, 7 February 2012
I was close enough to the office that I could have turned back and reclaimed it, but I couldn't face it for various reasons - not least because I am the very first to mock when a colleague leaves the office for the night only to return five minutes later to recover something they've forgotten. "Good morning!" I am the first to sing at them. (They must hate me.)
So I continued on my miserable way home, hoping that I was wrong and my phone was just in my bag and I just couldn't immediately put a hand on it. Unfortunately not. I got home, checked quickly and nope - nothing. So i did the only thing I could think of and facebooked a colleague I knew would still be in the office asking him to check. He replied and confirmed I had left it and he had, as directed, stuck it in my top drawer. Phew.
But while the worry may have stopped then that my little mobily would be nicked by some opportunist, then came the withdrawal. I may not use my phone a lot for actual PHONING purposes, but there are a lot of things I take for granted when it comes to my little phone friend. Such as:
- being able to check Twitter/Facebook on the loo (come on, we all do it - and it's REALLY not acceptable to take your laptop into the bathroom with you. Unless you don't have flatmates to catch you, that is...)
- knowing what's going on in general (I spent all evening worrying I had been invited to something glamorous via text that very night, or had missed out on a prime piece of gossip as I had no access to texts.)
- having no access to the internet during the night after I had put off my laptop. "I felt like I was in the dark ages!" I dramatically announced to my colleague this morning.
- the alarm function. Does anyone actually use an alarm that isn't on their phone anymore? I had to hunt around for the charger for my old Blackberry and hope for the best that the alarm still actually WORKED.
- knowing what the weather is like. I rely on my phone for this. Because it is sooo much simpler than looking out of the window (sarcasm alert there). Therefore I wore my Uggs to work when it was icy underfoot and risked falling.
Oh little phone friend, let us never part again!!!
*whispers* Well, at least not until I renew my contract in the next few months and get an upgrade . . .
(Did it hear me???)
What makes YOUR phone indispensable??? Or could you easily live without one?
Monday, 6 February 2012
Sunday, 5 February 2012
When I'm out for dinner and somehow suggests we have a main course each but just share a starter, I get a bit upset. The starter is usually my favourite bit - why are they trying to take that away from me by making me SHARE??? Never mind the fact that the starter will fill me up so much I will struggle to eat more than a few bites of my main - I WANT A WHOLE STARTER TO MYSELF AND THAT'S FINAL!!!
So you can probably see why tapas poses somewhat of a problem for me. It's one thing if you have sorted with your dining partner beforehand that you are each going to choose your own dishes and eat them BY YOURSELF. But it's quite another if you go with a few people and one of them says "Oh why don't we get a few dishes each and just share?" My heart sinks everytime this is said because I don't WANT to have to explain how anally retentive I am about sharing food - it means I end up not wanting to be greedy and eating much of the dishes I have chosen, and in the same vein, I don't feel comfortable eating too much of the dishes anyone else has selected. So I end up going hungry, and what's the point in that?
Thank god for the bread plates, that's all I can say! :-)
Do YOU like to share food???
Thursday, 2 February 2012
Wow. People have been up in arms about airbrushing, or other advertising tricks of a similar ilk, for years. I don't really see the point in stressing about it, personally. Is it REALLY such a big deal?
Look at it this way - we all know it happens. Generally, we can even TELL when someone has been airbrushed. The fact that they don't look REAL is probably the prime reason for this. No one really has skin that luminous, or hair that shiny, or a figure THAT unrealistic. A lot of the time I would PREFER to believe the celebrity in question had been airbrushed. THAT makes me feel better.
There's also talk that airbrushing celebrity bodies leads to eating disorders in young girls. Once again, I go back to my previous point - isn't it better that they aren't REALLY that skinny and we know WHY, rather than believing they achieved such uber-slenderness through their own hard work and starvation?
L'Oreal, like many other brands, have ALWAYS came under fire for what is effectively false advertising. We've always known that their mascara wasn't making the model's eyelashes incredible without use of falsies, just as its been fairly obvious on many occasions that the model's hair in a shampoo ad isn't just their own natural hair. I personally don't have any objection to this because, to me, its obvious. Maybe I just don't really believe the hype in adverts anymore (well, unless they're infomercials because I'm a sucker for the products they try to sell me in those) and I suppose I get my information about new beauty products from online reviews and blogs and REAL PEOPLE who have tried the product. I don't need Cheryl Cole or Rachel Weisz to tell me I'm worth it, especially when they aren't QUITE as naturally beautiful as the airbrushing or eyelash inserts are making us believe.
But, yes, as far as I'm concerned, I don't mind airbrushing because I can look at the picture of Rachel and think "yeah, she's been airbrushed, even SHE isn't perfect." I'd be more depressed to see an UNtouched picture of her and see how naturally beautiful she is in reality. If anything, I feel a TEENY bit sorry for her that L'oreal chose to do that to her - I would feel like I wasn't quite good enough!
So I say don't ban the airbrushing. But be HONEST about it.
We'll all feel better about ourselves as a result . . .
How do YOU feel about airbrushing?
- Money: I don't get paid for another week, and I'm running a little low on cash. Infuriating, because this is always the point where I see twenty million things (approximate figure, obvs!) that Imustbuyrightaway. Sigh.
- Lack of upper body strength: In my pole fitness class, I am meant to learn four more moves every four weeks. I am so crap at the moment, that I just completed the NINTH week of doing the same moves. My lack of upper body strength (kind of one of the most important things when trying to do pole dancing moves) is proving to be a bit of a burden. Note to self: MUST do the reps when I'm NOT in the class at least once a week.
- Willpower - the fact I possess none: I just CAN'T seem to get healthy, no matter how hard I try. My New Year's goal to get healthy has fallen by the wayside. Although I HAVE managed to not go out as much - which isn't much fun.
- Being ignored - it sucks. In a major way.
- Still ridiculously happy about my promotion a week on. Oh, and the fact that when I DO get paid, it will be better money makes having to WAIT for payday not quite so bad.
- "Confessions of a Karaoke Queen" by Ella Kingsley, the book I'm currently reading. It's really funny and I can barely put it down.
- Having a four day week - I finally got the day of festive leave I was owed back on Monday. It's meant my first week in my new position has been shorter . . . and has flown in. One more day to go and it's the weekend! :-)
- I have a friend's birthday night out to look forward to on Saturday night - Spanish tapas here I come!
What are your w(h)ines and loves this Thursday? Be sure to link up on Nora's blog if you take part!
Anyway, for the moment anyway, expect a lot more posts from me. I now have ideas coming out of my ears. Or something like that. In the meantime though, help a girl out . . . I have my blog READING mo-jo back too and I'm looking for some fab blogs to add to my google reader - who are your newest blog crushes? I like funny, I like random, I like rants, I like chat about boys, or chat FROM boys . . . throw some blog urls at me, help cheer me up!!!
And while you're doing that, I'll decide what one of my MANY post ideas (i may be exaggerating a bit here - I have about two) I'm going to use next.
Wednesday, 1 February 2012
I think, with the realisation today that it's February and that marks two months of my head being completely and utterly fucked for various reasons (like, even more than it had been initially before the beginning of December), it's just sent me over the edge.
December was a really weird month for me - quite a lot happened in a four week period. A lot of shit that probably shouldn't have happened, but that I hoped might just strengthen a friendship. Sadly, it seems to have been the reverse, and I have spent January in, I guess, some sort of denial.
And now it has truly hit . . . and it kills.
At one point today, I had to actually leave a room purely because it was hurting too damn much. Having a quick cry in the ladies' loos seemed like a far preferable option.
But I am so unbelievably sick of everything being on someone else's terms. I give up. I just can't do it anymore.
So I'm crying instead.
It is ironic because I am used to nothing going right with my life, but it is weird that the one thing that IS going right for a change is my job. I can DO this job, I am absolutely sure of it, and I am good at it. I deserve my promotion and I welcome the extra responsibility - and I'm over-the-moon to finally get a chance to prove myself. At least this is something that can at least help to take my mind off everything else. Because I am determined to make it count.
Because if that IS the only thing going right in my life . . .then I refuse to lose THAT too.
Tell me, please, how do I get myself out of this? What do YOU do when you just want to cry? Other than, obviously, cry!!!